You know, I’m awfully tired of people bitching and whining about fat people, and regarding us as if we were on a par with axe murderers or rapists, and disabled people are treated little better. Get some perspective, you whiny bastards!
From that, you’ll have gathered that I am one of the aforementioned fat people, and disabled, too, but consider this. Yesterday, I ate a can of Baxter’s tomato soup for lunch, in the evening I had a can of Heinz macaroni cheese, with a spoonful of grated Parmesan tossed in, plus some home-made pickled beetroot, and before going to bed I had one slice of Warburton’s stoneground wholemeal bread with Clover and Sandwich Spread, and that was a fairly typical day (in terms of quantity, not quality). Yet I’m substantially overweight.
The anti-fat brigade, of whom there are many, will just see a fat bloke and slip straight into condemnatory mode, without the slightest thought passing through their pointy heads about the reason for my weight. And, of course, it’s not just me, it’s anyone who doesn’t meet their scrawny criteria. And WTF do they get off being so ‘kin judgemental anyway?
Then there are the double standards of fatness. We’re told, rightly, that fat women have to be accepted for who they are, not to mention the insistence by the likes of Dawn French that fat women are sexy (but by some strange alchemy, fat men are not), yet the same women who are saying this condemn fat guys out of hand as slobs. Hypocrites. And here’s a thought – fat women often hook up with skinny guys, and yet this is only rarely reciprocated. Hmm…
OK, it’s true that some fat guys are slobs (and, of course, despite the propaganda, that applies to women as well), but many of us are not slobs at all, but do we ever get the benefit of the doubt? In your dreams!
I can’t speak for other guys (though many have genuine reasons, NOT excuses, for their weight), but there are several reasons why I’m fat (and like many guys, my excess weight is gathered around my waist, which has pretty much become an equator – were it evenly distributed, I’d look a hell of a lot better). You’ll find a load of reasons on this page . That’s my meds list, or part of it anyway, the part that relates to COPD – there are 5 other drugs taken to treat the symptoms of my ME/CFS (symptoms because there is no treatment for ME/CFS itself, no matter what snake-oil merchants claim), and my osteo arthritis, and a fair proportion of my meds, especially the steroids, cause weight gain.
The other reason is inactivity. I spend much of my day in front of the computer, or reading, because – for much of the time – I’m not able to do anything else. That’s NOT ABLE – not can’t be arsed, OK? Before I became ill, I was a backpacker (not the gap-year student kind, those buggers have just hi-jacked the name, but the long-distance-walking , carrying everything you need for survival on your back, kind), touring cyclist, Sunday rambler and sea angler – I spent every available minute outdoors. Then, in 1985, I crashed in flames.
These days I’m in often severe pain 24/7/365 (and that’s with medication – among other stuff, my CNS was damaged by a lighting strike in 83), permanently breathless and unable to walk more than a relatively few yards. That, no matter how little I eat, is why I’m fat (and my metabolism hangs on grimly to every sodding calorie it gets, no matter how few!), and being judged by my weight really – I mean REALLY! – pisses me off. Though not as much as being judged by my disability, to which we’ll come very shortly.
So what about fat guys and sex, I hear you ask? Well, from experience, the logistics of a fat bloke having sex with a slim woman are little different to the converse (yes, I was slim, not too long ago!). Really, though, in both cases, if you both have the imagination and ambition to look beyond a plain vanilla, missionary-position bonk, there just isn’t a problem – the possibilities are many and varied. In my case, there’s the added complication of disability, but that, in reality, limits only opportunity (because disabled people of both sexes are discriminated against as much as – and often more than – fat people), not performance. Let me tell you a story about opportunity…
Some years ago, when I was younger, I got talking to a very attractive woman in the pub. We got on like a house on fire, talking for hours and buying each other drinks. Inevitably, though, I needed a pee, and reached behind me to retrieve my crutches. And her smile vanished. When I got back she’d gone, as had the scraps of paper on which we’d exchanged phone numbers. So, without crutches I was clearly desirable, but with them I wasn’t. Thing is, though, either way ,I was the same ‘kin person! And that’s prejudice, pure and simple, my friends.
A lot of disabled people – fat or not – are in the same position; they couldn’t get laid if they were eggs! And that’s because, for the most part, people are amazingly shallow – yes, and prejudiced, too, because disabled, as well as fat, people, have become the new blacks; we can be discriminated against with impunity. You think I’m exaggerating? Borrow a wheelchair sometime, and take it to a shopping precinct, and you’ll make an interesting discovery – you’ve become an un-person, and very few people will actually see you, never mind make any attempt to accommodate you (hold the occasional door without being asked, or just have the sense to get the hell out of your way).
Consider, too, the things that are written about disabled people (fat people too, of course – denying us healthcare is a very popular idea, because hey, it’s our fault – except, mostly, it’s fuckin’ not!). David Freud, ex-crony of work and pensions secretary and all-round waste of blood and organs, James Purnell, lied atrociously to the Telegraph about Incapacity Benefit claimants, about a year ago, and the effects of this still rumble on today, reflected in the way central government treats us (see here if you missed it), which was seized upon by the equally dishonest and lazy hacks at the Daily Mail, here (dishonest, by the way, because it would have taken just a few minutes to find out the truth, but they simply couldn’t be bothered – why let the truth get in the way of a disgraceful story?). This would have quite possibly seen Freud in court had he lied to the same degree about almost any other group.
This wasn’t, incidentally, simply a guy getting his facts wrong by accident – there wasn’t a word of truth in what Freud said (which sparked a campaign to force him to retract; he didn’t). This, quite deliberately, was an act of propaganda on a level that Joseph Goebbels would have been proud of, and it was massively damaging to the public perception of the disabled community.
In this country, it is an offence to discriminate on the grounds of race, religion, gender, age, sexual orientation and pretty much anything else. Unless you’re fat and/or disabled, in which case, too damn bad.
And please, don’t wave the Disability Discrimination Act at me – it’s a bad joke. Here’s just one aspect – if I am discriminated against on the basis of my disability, I have to bring a prosecution myself, at my expense under the terms of the DDA. If I were black, let’s say, I’d just have to file a complaint with the appropriate body and the offenders would be taken care of (that’s a simplification, of course – my point is that I wouldn’t have to do it myself).
In Britain, today, the fat and the disabled have truly become society’s underclass (don’t give me an argument, go read the Daily Mail for a couple of weeks), because we’re easy targets and – unless we have pots of money to throw at the problem (try that on benefit) – we have no comeback. It insidiously pervades all levels of society from the government all the way down to personal relationships and, frankly, people, you’re a disgrace.