Epic failure…

Or why I can’t cook every day…

Tonight I did something I’ve not been able to do for years – I cooked a meal entirely from scratch. Nothing fancy, just bubble and squeak, with added onions softened in butter.

Normally I batch-cook casseroles for the freezer, or make soup and stash a large pot of it in the fridge** – both make much more sensible use of my limited physical resources and making enough for 6 meals takes only a little more effort than making one.

**Currently I have two pots – my usual veggie bean soup, but this time spiked with Harissa, and pinto beans and meatballs in a paprika-and-cumin-heavy sauce, which is excellent.

Of course, bubble and squeak is normally made from leftovers, but I don’t do leftovers – what gets cooked gets eaten, no bugger is blaming me for the waste food mountain, thank you so much – so if I fancy it I have to make it specially.

Had a batch of Tesco’s organic veg, an exercise in crapulosity, an alleged Savoy cabbage and a couple of small caulies. I say alleged because it’s years since I’ve seen a proper Savoy, with its vast dark green outer leaves like a wrinkled golf umbrella, and this one was no different – an exercise in pallid blandness (had one of the caulies yesterday – that tasted of bugger all too). I cook my greens with Maldon Sea Salt – if there’s any flavour, that stuff will bring it out – there wasn’t.

So, anyway, I cooked the cabbage and a pan of Rooster spuds, and left both to dry off while I sweated a couple of chopped cooking onions in clarified butter until they were very soft (with a sprinkle of fine sea salt to help the process along), and starting to brown here and there.

Combined everything, seasoned it with sea salt and white pepper, mixed it well, and fried a batch in olive oil. Result, a plateful of utter tastelessness that even HP Fruity couldn’t rescue.

And then – and this is why I can’t cook on a daily basis but can manage only once a week at best – I crashed – big-time spoonie crisis.

Out cold for hours, which meant that, as well as an entire evening gone, I missed a vital dressing change and, when I finally surfaced, felt far too ill to deal with it, so it’ll have to wait until tomorrow, which won’t do my leg any good. I should, of course, have done it Saturday morning, but I felt so ill I just couldn’t do anything, until it occurred to me that this was more Addison’s buggeration and that an extra dose of hydro might fix it – and what do you know – it did! Took a while to kick in – as with my morphine, I also respond only slowly to Hydro. Why, I know not.

I’m still coming to terms with the Addison’s fuckuppery, but one thing is clear – I need a higher base-level of Hydro. Trouble is, the normal maintenance dose is 15 to 30mg a day, in divided doses, and I’m taking 30 already. The hydro dose depends on body weight, though, and this dose was set when I’d lost 35kgs, since when I’ve regained 18kgs, so 30mg is arguably too low. I need an endocrinologist’s advice, and there is no sign that my GP is going to refer me – time to poke him with a stick again!

And it also occurs to me that the the cooking and crashing problems are things my GP doesn’t know but, hey, he soon will!

Whether he’ll actually give a shit is another question entirely!

And on that note, I’m off to bed…

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2 thoughts on “Epic failure…

    • Amazingly enough, I did, thanks. Having slept most of the evening I expected to be awake half the night. Settled down to read in bed – was gone in minutes.

      Now slaving over a hot stove!

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