Warning – contains ulcer photos some of you will find gross.
Yesterday – the first for several years – was a day in which pain featured only peripherally, due in no small part to the increase in medication enforced by the vascular surgeon.
That increase – which took an unforgiveable three weeks to get to me via my GP – was immediately followed by an attempt by him to stop my supply of Oramorph. I got it reinstated after dishing out a bollocking that surprised even me, during which he complained that I don’t keep him informed enough – a charge that’s only partly true.
Been playing with my new toy again, and still impressed with it. I’ve not used it outdoors yet, it’s too wet and I’m feeling too crappy, but as per my first impressions, even indoors and on carpet, it’s much easier to push, and faster.
Pretty much a basket case after fitting the FreeWheel gizmo yesterday. Not that it’s hard – it’s actually quite simple – but my leg took against it in a big way and, despite pushing my luck with Oramorph, and taking very great care not to bang it, it was agonisingly painful. Oddly, this morning, it’s less painful than normal and I’m trying very hard to keep it that way.
One major gripe. The US is one of only three countries still clinging to the outdated Imperial system of measurements. Considering that the FreeWheel needs several Imperial (in this case fractions of an inch), Allen keys, I wasn’t best pleased to see, in the installation instructions, the words “not included”. Why the bloody hell not? The thing cost me £350 – they can’t afford to include 3 Allen keys which, at trade prices, cost coppers each? Sod that!
As regular readers might know, my right leg, which has made my life a pure misery for the past few years (and especially this year and last), is scheduled for amputation next year (don’t have a date yet and I wish they’d hurry up!). For a while there, when the end was in sight, the pain was easier to bear. Now it’s not, it’s getting worse by the day – I just want it gone!
This will, naturally enough, present some problems as, since the crisis that put me in hospital in early 2013 (if you missed it I almost starved to death – anorexia, plus vomiting and diarrhoea, being symptoms of my then diagnosed, but kept secret by idiot doctor, Addison’s Disease), I’ve been very weak. I lost 35kg, much of it muscle mass, and never got it back (though, thanks to the steroid treatment for Addie’s, I have got fatter!).
Trigger warning: Mentions suicide. A View from Bed 3 post.
Everything changes next Tuesday when I’ll finally have room to use my wheelchair indoors. The pain won’t end as I still won’t be able to use it 100% of the time, but it’ll be greatly reduced (based on a trial last week).
Be aware – gross ulcer photo below.
Just had a conversation with my GP. He’s been in touch with the vascular doc, who has said – this bloody obsession again – that compression is the only way forward. I told him, when he asked if I’d be willing to try compression and – these are my exact words – I said “I’ll suck it and see.” That’s all. No promises beyond that, just a willingness to try it and see what happened.
This morning, in a discussion with the nurses about my deteriorating leg ulcer, all they can offer is compression – for which read MORE PAIN! Before they can do that they have to run an ultrasound test, and to do that they also have to check my lower leg blood pressure. And guess where the blood pressure cuff goes – yep, right on the ulcer. And that is just not going to happen.
At the moment I have a lightweight dressing on it, covered with two layers of very light tubular bandage. That, primarily, is sufficient to stop my leg swelling as well as keeping the dressing in place. It’s also staggeringly painful.
The nurse called out my GP just after 11.00. Told her he wouldn’t come and, sure enough, he hasn’t. Good job it wasn’t urgent. Just me in terrible pain, about which doctors appear not to give a shit.
So screw the bugger, I made an executive decision (just give me the drugs, don’t interfere, and let me figure out what works; after all, you’ve been doing that for years, you just didn’t know), increased the Gabapentin, and took Continue reading