You know, sometimes I feel cursed…

I was very ill last Tuesday, and in dreadful pain, so the nurse phoned the surgery to say I needed to see a doctor urgently. What I got, instead, was a phone call, during which I was told that the drugs prescribed only the previous week – by the same doctor – were completely  inappropriate.

I mean, in all seriousness, WTAF? Continue reading

A return to how things were. . .

You might have noticed that the tone and content of my blog has changed – I only rarely get involved in politics now.

Mainly that’s because things I predicted a year ago, and more, are coming to pass. The disabled now really ARE the 21st century equivalent of the mid 1930s Jews in Nazi Germany. All that’s lacking is the extermination camps, but even without them the death rate is ramping up.

The workhouse has apparently arrived in the form of Continue reading

Much more pain than I can deal with today…

Written at 08.00 today. And wow! was I ever wrong in yesterday’s post!

Apologies if this rambles a bit – I’m not in a good place right now.


My weak-as-piss Oramorph is useless (dose is 2.5 or 5ml – even 10ml does bugger all), and my Tramadol is now banned.

I know why, it’s because it competes with the same receptors as Gaba and morphine, to the detriment of all, but knowing that is no fucking help when I’m sitting here in absolute agony. And in tears – and believe me when I say I’m a hard bastard when it comes to pain, and it takes a hell of a lot to tip me over like this.** It’s happened just twice in my life, the first time just a month or so ago. But if I mention to my docs that I Continue reading

Interfering GP . . .

My GP telephoned me a couple of weeks ago saying he was cutting my Phyllocontin Continus by half, as he had been advised by the consultant at APH that the full dose was toxic.

I pointed out that the toxicity was based on blood tests that were now 4 months old and, when they were done I had lost a huge amount of weight – 31kg – which resulted in an effective overdose, hence the apparent toxicity. I had now regained much of that weight, had no reason to suspect that the full dose was still toxic, and would appreciate Continue reading

Playing doctors and nurses…

The nurse called out my GP just after 11.00. Told her he wouldn’t come and, sure enough, he hasn’t. Good job it wasn’t urgent. Just me in terrible pain, about which doctors appear not to give a shit.

So screw the bugger, I made an executive decision (just give me the drugs, don’t interfere, and let me figure out what works; after all, you’ve been doing that for years, you just didn’t know), increased the Gabapentin, and took Continue reading

The rather limited joys of Pleural Aspiration…

Before going on with this, someone asked me, vis-à-vis what I’ve written here about APH, if nothing went right – as if I make this shit up for entertainment! The answer is no, very little went right, OK?

The big thing – and I’m more than happy to give credit where it’s due – is that APH saved my life. That’s a fact. I’m still dying – that’s a fact, too, there is simply too much wrong with me for it to be fixable, not least because no-one knows exactly what’s gone wrong, which just leaves treating the symptoms.

The theory is that my Continue reading

Heart failure – the devil in the detail…

As you might know, I have heart failure – diagnosed 2 years ago. And it’s 2 years to the day that I got myself discharged before they had a second attempt at killing me (see next para), or five days and nights of sleep deprivation tipped me into a breakdown.

My previous cardiologist couldn’t ascribe a cause, despite the fact that I have two conditions, severe COPD, and aortic valve calcification, either of which, or both, could cause it. Given the severity and suddenness of onset, my guess is that, whichever, it was exacerbated by the pneumonia and empyema with which I was admitted to hospital, pulmonary backpressure overstressing my heart, not helped by the half-witted attempt to Continue reading

Chronicles of the Heart, Part 54 – Patients matter more than penny-pinching!

Let me say, at this point, that if I’m left alone to take Nebivolol at the dose I’ve worked out for myself, and which has proven is effective and safe, I’m fine – but the medical profession insists on fucking up my life, either through incompetence (Arrowe Park Hospital), or through, as is the case here, penny-pinching with a complete and utter disregard for patient safety.


I have diarrhoea again!

As you might know, I’ve had this problems since Christmas, along with a bout of vomiting I put down to a Norovirus infection for lack of any other apparent reason.

As I mentioned at the time, I suspected my beta-blocker, Nebivolol, was giving me grief, including Continue reading

Chronicles of the Heart, Part 53 – Bloody Doctors!

Well, here we are again. Having stabilised my condition I thought it would be quite some time before I had a need to write another instalment, but it seems my GP just can’t resist the urge to screw things up.

I take the now fine but previously extremely troublesome beta-blocker, Nebivolol, at the rate of 1.25mg twice a day – as the 2.5mg tablet is scored, this is simple enough. Now, though, in a spirit of penny-pinching, my GP wants to prescribe 5mg tablets, that I can cut up – completely ignoring the fact that Continue reading